Last Updated on: 11th January 2024, 11:16 pm
In my last post, I talked about the things you should not put up with. This week, I want to share my thoughts on the things we should say yes to, although it may seem counter-intuitive to do so. On the other hand, there are also a lot of good things we should say yes to, but which we either consciously or subconsciously push away from our lives.
Here goes some of the things you should welcome into your life.
1. Say YES to opportunities to have a good time
It may seem common sense that we should say yes to chances to have a good time—whether it’s to go to a friend’s party, meet someone for coffee, or go on a vacation. But we often turn down such opportunities due to the responsibilities we have or because we think such activities are frivolous and just distract us from the more important things like work, business, etc.
I used to be guilty of this. There was a time when I declined all invitations from friends to hang out. I didn’t even take time to do fun things because I thought that every minute I spent having fun would be a minute of being unproductive. I was so focused on trying to reach my goals that I didn’t want anything non-work-related to distract me.
It led me to becoming burnt out, though. In the end, it made me feel very physically tired, stressed out, and emotionally empty. Although I achieved pretty much all my goals, I realized that those goals meant nothing because I still wasn’t happy at the end of it.
I learned that it’s important to have a balanced life where you get to spend time to also have fun and enjoy yourself. Focusing on all the serious things all the time will soon leave you feeling drained, making you ineffective and inefficient at what you do.
2. Say YES to opportunities to learn
Thanks to the Internet, you can easily learn anything you want to. There are also a lot of free trainings online and offline.
If you want to keep growing and getting better at what you do, you have to ensure you keep learning. Whether you’re an employee with a regular job, an entrepreneur who runs a business, or a stay-at-home mom who cares for her family, people always come up with new and better ways of doing things, which may help you more easily get your tasks done.
Try to learn something new each day, and grab every learning opportunity you can get. This is one way of ensuring that you keep moving toward your goals, as you’ll always find new ways to improve.
3. Say YES to challenges
Challenges may have a negative connotation, as they mean something we should strive or struggle to overcome. With challenges usually come hardship or difficulty.
However, you should face all your challenges head on, as the process you go through in trying to overcome them will make you a stronger and better person.
You will learn a lot of things from your mistakes and failures—things which you probably won’t learn otherwise.
4. Say YES to delaying gratification
In this day and age when we can get almost anything we want with just a click of our fingers or a few taps on our phone, we can easily get tempted to go for things that give us instant gratification. However, the benefits we get from them are usually short-lived and insignificant when you think of them in the long term.
By choosing to delay our gratification, we are able to hold out for better things.
In a follow-up study conducted by the researchers of the Marshmallow Test, they found that the longer the children delayed gratification during the experiment, the better they did in life—in school, in their health, and at work.
Likewise, Temple University researchers found that in addition to occupation and education, the ability to delay gratification was among the leading predictors of financial success.
Delaying gratification enables you to develop better self-control, which in turn leads to a healthier and happier life. As such, when choosing a path to take—in your career, business, or life in general—consider the path that will yield better results in the long term.
A job may offer you a great starting salary but may not offer that much in terms of advancement while another job may offer you an average starting salary but offer amazing opportunities for growth.
On the other hand, you may choose between the certainty of earning a salary every month–where your salary growth may be menial–and the uncertainty of running a business where it may take time for you to profit but where you can potentially earn more than a regular salary in the long run.
Keep in mind that the most rewarding things are often the ones that involve the most challenges.
5. Say YES to positive/motivational messages
If you spend your days “digesting” negative things, then it can become harder to go through an already difficult day.
Instead of constantly watching the news or listening to/reading about other people’s problems, make positive and motivational messages a part of your day. What you take in is what you give out, so be sure to take in positive messages. This will ensure that you also act in a positive way.
In addition, they help you keep going even on those days when you feel down or stuck.
6. Say YES to new opportunities
Even if you don’t grab every opportunity that comes your way, don’t be quick to say no to them either.
I believe that everything happens for a reason, and if an opportunity comes your way, it must have been given to you for a purpose, even if that purpose doesn’t seem clear to you at the time.
I had a psychic friend, and he advised me before that I was going to have some new prospective clients and to not turn them down right away.
Indeed, those opportunities came a few days later (on the same day, too!), and usually, I base my decision on whether or not to grab a work opportunity on the compensation. Well, the two prospective clients didn’t offer a compensation that excited me, but remembering my friend’s advice, I accepted their offers anyway.
I lasted only a month with one of the clients, as we had different work styles, but the work processes I learned from him, particularly the way he managed his virtual team, were the same work processes I later adopted in running my own virtual team. Needless to say, these new work processes were better than the way I used to manage my team. I never would have learned about them had I not worked for that client.
With the other client, I ended up working for hm for about a year. It wasn’t the most satisfying job I had, but working with the client inspired me to start my own company. I realized that he was doing so well in his business as a content services provider despite not having a writing background. I have an extensive writing experience, so I figured that I should be able to do a better job at running a content writing service business. In addition, my experience in working with him taught me what to do and not do in running a content services company.
Every opportunity that comes your way is worth considering at the very least, as you never know what gifts they have in store for you.
7. Say YES to new experiences
Whether it’s trying a new dish, going to a new place, or trying a new activity, be open to trying them. Even if you end up not liking them, you would have at least gained first-hand knowledge of doing them, which can serve you in some way in the future. On the other hand, if you end up liking them, then you would have added a new joyful thing into your life.
Either way, trying out new experiences can enrich your life. As long as you have nothing to lose and no one will be harmed, why not try something new?
8. Say YES to calculated risks
It is scary to take risks, even if they’re calculated ones. This means giving a part of yourself–your time, energy, or money–into something whose outcome you’re not sure. You’re scared of potentially losing something with no certainty of a return.
However, it can be that taking the risk will lead to something good, and not taking it would mean you missed out on something great.
The way I see it, if you take a risk and fail, then you would have learned something (what not to do or how to overcome the mistake you did), which means it still wasn’t a loss. But if taking the risk ends up working in your favor, then the rewards can be great.
Be brave enough to take that leap of faith!
9. Say YES to change
We often say no to change because we don’t want to leave our comfort zones. However, not wanting to change can leave us stuck where we are. No matter how good things are going for us at the moment, time will come when we will want something more or something different.
But why wait until you’re in a rut before you make a change? Change comes with new opportunities. They will give you renewed energy and will give you a new sense of purpose, in turn leading to continued self-fulfillment.
Make change a constant part of your life.
10. Say YES to meeting new people
As an introvert and being quite shy, I’m averse to meeting new people. I don’t know what I would say to them, and I’m somehow scared of what they would think of me.
But I realized that this fear was limiting me, so I tried to overcome it by intentionally going out to meet new people. I joined groups that were outside my circle of friends. I mustered the courage to sit among groups of strangers despite feeling like wanting to dissolve.
Well, I can say the experience improved my life. It helped me gain confidence, and it allowed me to gain new insights and learn new things from the people I met.
Meeting new people can help you find like-minded individuals with whom you can build strong connections and relationships, which may or may not be currently present in your life.
Even if the new people you meet seem different from you, it is always a worthwhile experience. It will make your world seem bigger, and it will make you realize that you’re not so different from them after all.
11. Say YES to feedback
Always say yes to feedback. Even go out of your way to seek it. We tend to feel anxious about receiving feedback because we’re afraid of being criticized. We don’t want to be shamed. We don’t want to feel like we’re inadequate or are not good enough.
But we shouldn’t see feedback so negatively. Constructive feedback can help us improve. We are not always aware of what we do or what the outcomes of our actions are, so having other people tell us about them helps us identify areas we can improve on.
Although there’s also the chance we might receive destructive or negative feedback, this shouldn’t make us fearful of being criticized in general.
Get to know yourself well enough, so that you can identify when the feedback you’re receiving is meant to hurt or help you. If they’re hurtful, then just ignore them. Understand that the person giving the feedback is probably not in a good place in their life and that their actions have nothing to do with you.
At the very least, being the recipient of such hurtful feedback will teach you not to do the same to others.
12. Say YES to making others feel better
Grab every opportunity to make others feel better, whether it’s to help them, listen to them, or just keep them company. Every act of kindness counts. Not only are you making them feel better, but you’re also making your life more fulfilling and meaningful.
There’s no better reward than knowing you’ve made a difference.
13. Say YES to some alone time
Welcome any opportunity to spend some time alone. This will give you time to reflect on your life and take a break from your daily routine. However you choose to spend your alone time, It will help you recharge, making you ready to face the world again.
14. Say YES to setting new goals
One way to always feel fulfilled and purpose-driven is to always set new goals for yourself.
I liken this to a video or mobile game. When you’re playing a game, you’re always excited to reach the next level, but once you’ve completed all levels, you lose interest in the game, making you look for another one or stop playing altogether.
I believe that life works in the same way. We get so excited to reach the next milestone toward our goal, but once we’ve reached our goal, we tend to lose interest in life.
We tend to feel an emptiness, a lack of fulfillment, or a lack of purpose once we stop striving for something.
No matter how successful you become, there’s always something new that’s worthwhile to work toward.
15. Say YES to complimenting others
Be generous with compliments. You lose nothing when you compliment someone. You don’t become any less competent, efficient, or effective at what you do when you tell someone they did well.
However, such kind gesture will make a difference for the other person. It may just be the encouragement they need to keep going. On your part, developing a habit of complimenting others and seeing the good in them makes it easier for you to also compliment and see the good in yourself.
How you see others is a reflection of how you see yourself, so by changing your outward behavior, it may follow that your beliefs and perspectives will change as well.
16. Say YES to being vulnerable
Being vulnerable isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of courage and strength. It shows that you are comfortable enough with yourself that you’re able to share the real you with the world. It may be difficult at first, but once you get to do this, you will feel a sense of freedom and relief.
When I was in the Philippines, I joined cell groups (we called them light groups) that were formed within my prayer community. We met every week and shared our experiences—both the good and bad—with each other.
I’ve been joining such groups for many years. At first, I was very reluctant to open up and share my innermost thoughts and feelings. I was afraid of being judged, and I was like, what do they care anyway? They won’t be able to change my situation.
Eventually, though, I earned to be more open, and talking about very personal things felt like having some weight taken off my shoulder. It’s so tiring to always put on a tough façade and to always wear a mask showing you’re okay.
By allowing yourself to become vulnerable even for a moment, you get to have some reprieve somehow. It allows you to become your true self—without any pretenses–even for a few moments. At the same time, it allows other people to better relate and connect to you.
Another way you can show some vulnerability is by not feeling like you have to be the best at everything. It’s okay to make mistakes, to ask other people for help, or to admit that you don’t know something.
No one expects you to be perfect. It’s okay to relax and be human.
17. Say YES to speaking your mind
We often suppress our thoughts and keep them to ourselves for fear of offending or for fear of being judged. But doing this would mean we have to agree with what everyone else says or does.
I find nothing more frustrating than this. It’s like you’re restricting yourself from expressing what you say or feel—as if you don’t have a mind of your own.
It’s better to speak your mind than to feel like blowing up from holding in what you really think and feel.
Just be sure to say whatever you have to say in a respectful way. If others judge you for your different perspectives, respect that. Not everyone has to agree with you.
If they get offended despite your respectful manner of communicating your thoughts, then respect that, too. They’re entitled to react to what you say however way they want, but this doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you. You don’t need to apologize for thinking and feeling the way you do.
18. Say YES to being different
Don’t ever feel like you have to be the same as everyone to be accepted. If your preferences, way of thinking, and convictions happen to be different from those of the people around you, then be okay with that. You don’t need their approval.
Embrace everything that you are, including your quirks and peculiarities. The people who matter will accept you for exactly who you are.
If you have weird and unique ideas that others don’t understand, go ahead and pursue them. They will give you a competitive edge as you strive to achieve your goals.
Only by being your own unique self will you be able to leave your own unique mark in the world.
19. Say YES to being around more successful and smarter people
Don’t feel intimidated about being around people who are smarter or more successful than you. Don’t feel like you’re inferior to them either. Truly successful people have had humble beginnings, too. They are likely to empathize with someone who’s in the same shoes as they had been in the past.
Being around more successful and smarter people ensures you’re in good company. You can learn a lot from them, and they can influence your mindset and perspectives in positive ways.
As the preachers in my prayer community tell us, the lives of the people you spend the most time with will likely determine the kind of life you’ll lead in the future.
You don’t have to hang around people less than you just to feel superior. This may even lead you to becoming like them. To illustrate, if you always hang around bullies, it’s not unlikely that you’ll become a bully yourself.
Instead, hang out with people who are successful if you want to be successful.
Be selective of the people you allow into your life.
20. Say YES to keeping an open mind
Keep an open mind about everything and everyone. Don’t be so quick to shut down an idea, as it may have more merit than you give it credit for.
Don’t be so quick to judge someone. You may realize that they’re beautiful people if you only take the time to get to know them.
Don’t be so quick to dismiss other people’s perspectives. Trying to understand where they’re coming from will give you a better understanding of the world.
Whatever it is that you encounter, always try to keep an open mind about them. Give yourself a chance to get to know and understand them better before you decide on how you feel about them.
Remember that not everything is as they seem.
21. Say YES to happiness
This is another common-sense thing that people should aspire for. However, there are some who seem so comfortable with their loneliness or their pain that they don’t want to make the effort to seek happiness.
Now I don’t want to judge or offend anyone. I understand that we all go through different things and that it may be harder for some to try to find happiness.
However, remember that no one can do this for you. No one can make you happy unless you want to. No one can fix you, and no one can heal you unless you take that first step toward your healing.
22. Say YES to peace
Aren’t we supposed to naturally want peace? We should, but we often get caught up in situations where we feel the constant need to defend ourselves or to prove that we are right. This can lead to a lot of arguments and strained relationships that can deprive us of our peace of mind.
Say yes to peace by taking the high road every time. You don’t always have to defend yourself, and you don’t always have to prove you’re right. It’s enough that you know where you stand and what your convictions are even when nobody else recognizes them.
Choose your battles and let go whenever possible.
23. Say YES to all your blessings
When we set our goals, we have our eyes only on the big prize such that we disregard the small wins we attain along the way.
Be grateful for all your blessings, no matter how small they may seem. This sense of gratitude allows you to use these small wins to motivate yourself to keep going as you try to achieve your goals.
In addition, being grateful about everything helps you gain a better appreciation of life, in turn allowing you to attract even more positive things.
What other things do you say yes to in your life? Please share in the comments below.
